Dear Gavin Newsom, Hi, My Name is Chicken John…


Chicken John has placed the following full-page ad (here’s a larger version) on page 19 of the August 8th edition of the San Francisco Bay Guardian. Chicken, who is running for Mayor of San Francisco, needs to raise $5000 by 5pm this Friday, August 10th in order to be on the ballot.

In the ad, Chicken is asking our current mayor, Gavin Newsom, to help contribute to his campaign, so that Gavin will have an opponent in the election (Chicken promises not to win). Do you think Gavin will go for it?

Here’s Chicken’s write-up on his fundraising efforts, including his awesome recommendations for donation amounts.

To drive the point home, I’ve been writing some random things. I’ll include a few here. These are some ideas on why or how you should nudge some greenbacks my way:

If you had a friend that had to move away from SF because it was too expensive, send me $20 per friend.

If you are an artist and never considered that the Arts Commission of SF represents you, send me $10.

If you or someone you know lost a car to being towed and you owed too many parking tickets send me $25 per lost car.

If you or someone you know was involved in an art space that was shut down by the city send me $37.

If you would like to make a few busses run on gasified coffee grinds send me 10 bucks.

If you don’t like that bow and arrow bullshit on the embarkadero send me 10 cents. (that’ll be a few hundred thousand dollars.)

If you think that our mayor needs to be challenged on issues involving the arts, too many cars and being intolerant to inovation and new ideas send me $20.

If you feel like you are disenfranchised and unrepresented send me $40.

If you feel like the green campaign that the city is force feeding SF is actually greenwashing, send me $10.

If you want to help Chicken with his campaign to become Mayor of San Francisco, you can donate online via PayPal.


Scott Beale
Scott Beale

Scott Beale founded Laughing Squid in 1995 in San Francisco and is currently based in New York City. When not running the blog, Scott can be found posting on Threads and sharing photos on Instagram.