Guitarist Turns Footage of the ‘Why Are You Closed’ Shopper From 2010 Into a Badass Heavy Metal Song

Talented guitarist Andre Antunes, who previously turned a couple of televangelist Kenneth Copeland’s rants into rocking heavy metal songs, gave the same treatment to funny footage of a loudly incensed man at the Eaton Center Mall in Toronto who repeatedly demanded at the mall’s doors “why are you closed?”. A couple of cheeky teenagers hilariously mocked the increasingly frustrated wannabe shopper by pretending to climb the walls.

Why are you closed? Tell us why you’re closed?
Tell us why you’re closed?
Why? Why? Why, are you closed?
I want to go shopping in the Eaton Centre, why are you locked?
Why are you closing your doors?
Why are you locking your doors to the public?
Why, tell us the reason, why? Why?
Tell us the reason? Tell us the reason, why?
Why are you putting people through this? Why? Why?
Why are you putting us through this?
Who gave you the right? Who gave you the right?
What right do you exclude the population? Why?
Who are you? How dare you do this to us?
We are the Toronto Public, we want to shop, we want to get into the Eaton Centre, it is a public place, it says it’s open till 7 o’clock.
Why are you closed? Why? Why? Tell us why? Tell us why?

The original incident took place in 2010 when the doors to the mall were locked on one side due to G20 protests nearby. Here’s the original footage.

Lori Dorn
Lori Dorn

Lori is a Laughing Squid Contributing Editor based in New York City who has been writing blog posts for over a decade. She also enjoys making jewelry, playing guitar, taking photos and mixing craft cocktails. Lori can be found posting on Threads and sharing photos on Instagram.