The Billboard Liberation Front and Ron English have joined forces once again (the last time was in 2002). This afternoon they modified a billboard across from Golden Gate Park at the Cala Foods on Stanyon Street near Haight Street in San Francisco.

After receiving an anonymous tip, I went down to where the billboard liberation was taking place and shot a bunch of photos.

Photos of Billboard Liberation Front: To Serve Man

According to the press release, their billboard improvement was called “To Serve Man” and was in celebration of McDonald’s 50th Anniversary. This billboard modification was above an beyond what is typical for the BLF and included an animatronic Ronald McDonald force feeding a hamburger to an obese child, with a backdrop covering the billboard which consisted of well-fed Ronald McDonald and alien figures.

This was a very bold billboard improvement, since it took place in broad daylight in The Haight near Golden Gate Park, with people and cops all over the place. Not to mention the fact that they covered the entire billboard and installed two sculptures, including one that was kinetic and required a power source.

Once the billboard improvement was completed, dozens of Ronald McDonalds and a couple Hamburglers converged on the scene to help celebrate this occasion. They then proceeded to invade the McDonald’s across the street.

Soon after, the SFPD with the help of the SFFD removed the animatronic Ronald McDonald and child sculpture. It’s reported that Ronald was not read his Miranda rights as he was escorted into the (hamburger) patty wagon. The latest reports we have received are saying that the actual billboard modification was still in place, so their still may be time for you to go down and see it in person.

Here’s the press release that was sent to us by the Billboard Liberation Front:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

1:30pm May 30th, 2005

Location: Billboard in the Cala Foods parking lot, corner of Haight St & Stanyan St, San Francisco

McDonalds is virtually ignoring its own golden anniversary with the modesty and humility of a king, even though McDonald’s 50th is an event of colossal significance for shareholders, staff, customers, and indeed, all of mankind. Thus, the Billboard Liberation Front (BLF) and Ron of the East will provide our most inspirational client with a gratis improvement in honor of McDonalds campaign “To Serve Man.”

The improvement illuminates and memorializes McDonalds’ far-reaching vision of Service to Man with two unique components. The background is an original 12’ x 22’ painting by noted New York artist Ron of the East, whose work was featured in the film Supersize Me. The foreground will feature the world’s first animatronic billboard alteration: a life-sized figure of Ronald McDonald feeding a corpulent child his daily dose of Big Macs. This represents yet another stunning innovation in realm of billboard alteration arts by San Francisco’s own Billboard Liberation Front.

Yet, this innovation pales in light to the dedication of McDonalds To Serve Man. With each successive year McDonalds has unflinchingly and subserviently fed more and more of humanity for the lowest of possible prices. All the while, they have selflessly prepared Earth and all its inhabitants for our ultimate purpose in the Universal Scheme of Things, as writer Rod Serling presaged in the 1960’s. That Grand Design is now ready for Mass Consumption.

Mankind is ready to serve, and McDonalds’ is the corporation to do the serving. After 50 years of eating more and more Big Macs, French fries, and McNuggets designed to enhance our serve-ability, we are finally ready! Untold billions of meals consumed by billions of people throughout the world, have sufficiently enlarged the average girth and tenderness of McDonalds’ patrons (i.e. you) to reveal the True Meaning of life on Earth! Keep your eyes to the skies and watch for the big, shiny saucers with the gold-arched logos that are going to whisk us away to our inevitable and glorious destiny among the stars. Soon McDonalds will truly fulfill its mission To Serve Man.

UPDATE 1: Jackson & Sarah filed their report at SFist, complete with mp3’s and video!

UPDATE 2: Eric in SF has some photos of other BLF/Ron English billboard alterations that occured the week leading up to the big one on Memorial Day: “Fat, F*ck’d-Up & 50!”, “McSoylent Gold Is Cattle!” & “The Mother of All Milkshakes!”

UPDATE (8-11-2005): Elliot has reported on his blog that one of the Ron English/BLF billboard modifcations is still up.

Rudy & Penny are tying the knot. Congratulations guys!

Here are my photos from their engagement shindig which took place at the amazing Albany Bulb, a former homeless artist encampment in the old Albany Landfill. If you haven’t been there yet, you really should check it out. Tomas McCabe and Andrei Rozen have produced the documentary “Bums’ Paradise”, which chronicles the life and struggles of the people who lived there before they were evicted.

According to SF Gate, master of chaos Chicken John is starting a think tank. Would this be a dunk tank, like the one that he’ll be in after losing his BORG2 bet? Possibly, since Chicken actually has quite a bit of dunk tank experience.

Or are we talking Sherman Tank? If so borg9 has him beat with their art grant for “Rathyatra”.

This Chicken news is in conjunction with the “Faces of Burning Man” gallery on SF Gate which is part of a bigger story on Burning Man from yesterday’s San Francisco Chronicle:

SPREADING THE FLAMES
BURNING MAN AT 20: Acolytes take a creative approach to building a sense of community
by Leslie Fulbright & Meredith May
Sunday, May 29, 2005

Our good friend Ron English is having a solo show “Son of Pop” at Varnish Fine Art in San Francisco from May 28 - July 2, with an opening on Thursday, June 2nd from 7:00pm to 11:00pm.

Ron English is widely considered to be one of the seminal figures in the ever-growing culture jamming movement. He has pirated over a thousand billboards over the last twenty years, replacing existing advertisements with his own hand-painted “subvertisements.” Ron is also a well-known Pop painter, whose work has been exhibited in galleries and museums worldwide, including the Museum of Contemporary Art in Paris and the Whitney Museum in New York. This is a comprehensive survey of his art, covering 20 years of his career, from staged photography to neo-surrealist oil paintings, from street art to culture jamming. An important look at the work of an artist who has been at the forefront of movements in photography, painting, activist art, and underground music.

Pedro Carvajal’s documentary “Popaganda: The Art and Subversion of Ron English”, which was recently featured in the San Francisco Documentary Festival, will be shown at Varnish on June 11th at 8pm. A book by the same name, was published by Last Gasp in 2004.

UPDATE 1: Here are my photos from the May 28th preview party.

UPDATE 2: Thomas Hawk has a great write-up of the opening including photos (if they load slow, try his Flickr set).

Here are my photos from last night’s closing event for Attaboy’s exhibtion “The Fungus”, including Attaboy & Burke, KRK Ryden on the Theremin and Madagascar Hissing Cockroaches.

Chicken John, former dictator of The Odeon Bar, is now involved producing shows with actual, talented circus performers, unlike his previous circus activities.

From Chicken’s Damnlist about tonight’s show:

The Odeon closed it’s doors last week, and no longer will the variety arts showcase Mecca be hosting impossible shows. Unless of course owner Chicken John decides to throw one at 12 Galaxies, which is precisely what is happening on Friday, May 27th.

Serving odd communities is what Chicken does… defending justice, throwing a glove at the feet of Burning Man, championing the amateur and basically pulling out of his ass things that other people don’t really see. Like the fact that 12 Galaxies has high ceilings, and there is no place in the Mission that has a trapeze rig. So he hired a rigger, put up the truss and put together: Music To NOT Plummet To Your Death By: an evening of improv trapeze and music. The band Kugelplex will provide the music: a blend of traditional klezmer and gypsy executed with wild blazing passion. 10 aerialists will provide the trapeze including: Lorelei Ashe MacDonald, Jen Moore, Jaiar, Miriam Telles, Carrie Lynn Rosenbaum, Abigail, Abbey, Audrey, Emily and Alannah. The band will play improv, and the aerialists will do whatever they want. It will be interesting to see what they come up with. Might be genius. Might be ridiculous. As long as no one plummets to their deaths it will be fun. Ah, the circus…

Headlining the event is the delicate and awe-inspiring STARLINGS; duo trapeze with Ena and Danny Starling. This dazzling display of danger and death-defying dexterity will astound, amaze and inspire. Clad in luxurious, jewel-encrusted costumes the Starlings nimbly engage in a a sultry and astonishing spectacle. Backed by the solid mastery of the As Is Brass Band, the Starlings are not to be missed: an achievement at the top of their class.

This show is priced moderately at $8, and I hope you will come to support the circus arts of San Francisco. You will likely never see a dozen aerialists in one show again.

The Odeon lives on!!!!!!

Power Sentry’s wonderful PowerSquid Power Multiplier is without doubt the coolest powerstrip ever!

The flexible arms of the PowerSquid, which have varying lengths of six, eight and ten inches, allow each outlet to be readily positioned for convenient use. The contemporary design of the PowerSquid features a black hub and yellow receptacles. The unit also incorporates a yellow lighted master on/off switch which indicates that the unit is operational. A built-in 15-Amp circuit breaker adds safety for attached equipment, while a four-foot 14/3 power cord provides additional flexibility of movement for users.

This is one of the best cephalopodic tools I’ve seen since the amazing Octodog Frankfurter Converter that came out a couple of years ago.

Previously I had mentioned that the San Francisco’s legendary Albion Castle was for sale. Here are a few updates:

1) The Albion Castle will be sold to the highest bidder on June 11th, 2005. Here’s more information on the auction. There will be an open house on May 28th and 29th from 12:00pm to 3:00pm. The owner is charging $10.00 per person to view the Albion Castle. Hey, when we had our party we let you see if for free.

2) Former castle resident Paul de Jong recently launched albioncastle.us which has some historical information and photos of The Albion Castle.

3) On Monday, May 23rd The San Francisco Examiner published an article on The Albion Castle written by Justin Jouvena: “Finally, a home fit for a king in San Francisco”. This article mentions a “modern kitchen”. Lori wants to know how a 70’s style kitchen, which appears to been put together from Home Depot, can be considered modern. Then again, I guess that it is modern compaired to a 135 year-old castle.

4) An auction pamphlet was mailed out that conviently failed to mention that The Albion Castle is located in Hunter’s Point, right under the projects. Here’s how they describe it:

“Albion Castle, located directly in the center of the up and coming waterfront community of Inda Basin, has exellent potential for the creative buyer”.

Wow, now that’s some imaginative marketing hype. If you really want to know about the neighborhood, I would suggest renting Kevin Epps’s documentary “Straight Outta Hunters Point”.

UPDATE: The Albion Castle sold for 2.1 million and the new owner plans on turning it back into a brewery, bottling water from the natural springs and eventually opening up a restaurant. The San Francisco Examiner has the full story.

Tomorrow (Friday, May 27th) is the closing of Attaboy’s art installation “The Fungus” at Buzz Gallery in Oakland. This special event will feature live performances by Attaboy and Burke, KRK Ryden on the Theremin and Alegra the Hissing CockRoach Wrangler Show.

Attaboy’s bulging glob forms rendered in sepias seem even more uneasy and uncertain without their sophisticated color palette “skin” they’ve grown accustomed to. The series also delves deeper into Attaboy’s current fascination with the paranoid and drooling worker bee. Through “The Fungus” he explores the bee’s misplaced yet unquestioning obligation, his neuroticism and a manic obsessive compulsion.

BitTorrent, a popular open source peer-to-peer file distribution system used for primarily for video, just launched their long-anticipated search feature. This should be interesting as many lawsuits are surely soon to follow.

Now if it only had IMDB integration…

via: Joi Ito

Is legendary record producer Phil Spector currently on trial for impersonating 70’s cartoon fashionista Hair Bear?

This just in from borg9, “The other white borg”:

borg9 is pleased to announce its art grant for Burning Man 2005, which by unanimous vote, will be awarded to San Francisco’s notorious Seth Maxwell Malice.

The piece, “Rathyatra,” is conceptualized as a giant spiked wheel big enough to roll over more than 50 percent of Black Rock City in one pass, lives up to a fine Burning Man tradition of overweening excess and practical near-impossibility, as well as touching casually and clearly as an afterthought on many themes central to the event’s heart

“The juggernaut is a concept derived from a non-western religion, which I understand these people at Burning Man like,” says artist Seth Maxwell Malice. “As for the psyche, the brain, and consciousness, this year’s Burning Man art theme, well, the brain is one of many organs that will be changed forever by its encounter with this work.

“Also, I’m sure I can line the thing with blinking lights of some sort before it’s all over.”

“This work,” borg9 officials said in announcing there granting of their entire art budget of $500,000 to the piece, “lives up to our dearest hopes for more impactful art on the playa. It will deeply effect every single citizen of Black Rock City. It’s interactivity is severe and inescapable and profound.”

Mark Perez will be running his amazing Life Size Game of Mouse Trap tomorrow, Saturday, May 21st down at his barn in San Francisco (702 Earl Street). There will be 3 shows which will take place 4:00pm, 7:00pm and 9:30pm, as well as DJ’s and live music by Esmerelda Strange and One Man Banjo. All for $5.

Here are my photos from a Mouse Trap event in 2004 and one in 2003. The photos do not do it justice. This is a wonderful and incredible kinetic sculpture is something that has to been seen in action.

The LIFE SIZE MOUSETRAP is a fantastically hand crafted, 16 piece 50,000-lb. interactive KINETIC SCULPTURE set atop a 6,500-square-foot, 2,000-lb GAME BOARD. This giant Rube Goldberg style contraption comes complete with a VAUDEVILLIAN style carnival show, original MUSICAL SCORE, CAN-CAN DANCERS, acrobatic HIJINKS, and other Spectacularly scripted SCENARIOS dedicated to the bending of reality!

This show is in conjunction with Mark’s bid to win an art grant from BORG2 so that he can take the Mouse Trap back out to Burning Man this year (the last time he took it out there was back in 1996). You can register to vote at borg.org and in order to vote for the Mouse Trap or any other art proposal, you’ll need to register by May 26th.

Here’s Mark Perez’s BORG2 proposal:

If this MONSTROSITY is properly supported, it will DISPEL your average DESERT experience. I plan to place the MOUSETRAP and its BURLESQUE dripping sideshow inside a BIZZARE CARNIVAL atmosphere. Where lucky contestants can PICK EACH OTHER’S POCKETS, lift a 350-lb CAST-IRON BATHTUB 12 feet into the air, turn impossibly huge GEARS, load SPRINGS, and light a 13-foot TALL FLAME-THROWING LAMP POST all in a SUPREME effort to CRUSH a TRINKET of MEANING (say, a BIRTHDAY CAKE or a thought provoking EFFIGY) u0nder a FALLING 2 TON BANK SAFE! Be it an enormous construct of CRAZY STAIRS, careening FLAMING BOWLING BALLS, or the unique HAND-BUILT, 30-foot-tall CRANE, the MOUSETRAP can deliver SPECTACLE by the TRUCK LOAD! For a sacrificial sum of $9,000 +/- the voters will know that they brought the MOUSETRAP to the desert. Due to THEMATIC limitations twice the Burning Man ORG. has REJECTED this project. It’s now up to YOU to show the blind how to see!

Chuck Palahniuk is in the Bay Area this week to promote his new book “Haunted”. We first met Chuck back in 1996 during the Portland Santacon event. This was before “Fight Club”, his most popular book, came out and at the time he was writing an article for Harpers about the whole Santarchy thing. It turns out that Chuck, who lives in Portland, had been hanging out with the Portland Cacophony Society (our hosts for that year’s Santacon). When “Fight Club” the book and later the film came out, there were obvious tribuets to The Cacohpony Society. Later on in “Fugitives And Refugees”, his book about Portland, Chuck mentions the Portland Santacon event and a photo from it was even used as the book’s cover. Because of this, Chuck has had a close association with The Cacophony Society and Santarchy. Sometimes when he does a book reading, members of the local Cacophony lodge will show up and try to “prank” him. Gary Singh wrote about all of this yesterday in “Chuck Amuck”, a piece he did for the Metro.

Chuck is scheduled to appear at the following Bay Area book stores:

Thursday, May 19th (7:30pm) - Kepler’s, Menlo Park
Friday, May 20th (7:30pm) - Cody’s Books, Berkeley
Saturday, May 21st (7:00pm) - A Clean Well Lighted Place for Books, San Francisco

photo: Chris Saunders

Ok, this is it. Tonight’s installment of “Ask Dr. Hal”, “When Rhedosaurs call it quits! “, is the last Ask Dr. Hal ever at The Odeon Bar. As we mentioned yesterday, this is the final week of The Odeon Bar. The end. That’s all she wrote.

Here are my photos from last week’s epic show.

Tonight will be your last chance to ask Dr. Hal that question, the one question that has always been burning a hole in your mind. It doesn’t matter how absurd or trivial you may think your question might be, ask away. Hal will reward you will an answer that will exceed all your expectations. Hell, if the question is good enough, Chicken will even give you a shot of the coveted Fernet-Branca.

The final opening acts will be Nice Pants!, Robin Frohardt, Kelek, Ralph Carney and The Jelly Doughnut, the world’s largest and only rappin’ pastry.

The Last of the First Acts, a Huge, Animate Doughnut Takes the Stage! more carbohydrates and cholesterol than you have ever seen before in one place. He will “rap” on many topics, some not doughnut-related

Of course there will be Pete Goldie’s science report just prior to the show and David Capurro doing the Google images thing throughout the show. See you there!

Here are some of Hal’s favorite questions from previous shows:

“Dr. Hal, is there anything to Numerology?” (A Dr. Hal Classic)

Well, I’d probably use scientist Pete Goldie’s term to describe this particular superstition– “Malarkey.” Still, History abounds with curious numerical coincidences, and numbers phenomena have been of compelling interest to many in its pages. Take the case of composer Richard Wagner (1813-1883), who was haunted all his life by the number 13. There’re 13 letters in Wagner’s name, and the sum of the figures in the year of his birth were 13. He made his first public appearance in 1831, the numbers of which year– add ‘em up– also come to 13. He completed his opera, Tannhauser, on April 13, and it was performed, in Paris, on March 13, 1861. Then on August 13, 1876, he began the first presentation of his epic masterwork the Ring of the Nibelungen. The year he was made Director of the State Theater at Riga, this theater opened on– September 13. Wagner wrote 13 operas in all, was exiled from Saxony for 13 years, and died, still fearing the number 13, on the 13th day of the month in the 13th year of the new German Confederation (the “Second Reich”). What does this all prove? Not much, in my opinion, when put up against all the other numbers in the composer’s life that didn’t add up to 13. But he wrote some pretty good operas, and his music even provided the inspiration for a Bugs Bunny cartoon, years later (”What’s Opera, Doc?” Warner Bros., dir. Chuck Jones, 1957). Yes, answering questions, that’s what it’s all been about… don’t knock it, it was a good gig…

“Dr. Hal, what’s the difference between a weasel and an ermine?” writes Anthony Phoer of San Francisco.

Thought you’d trick me, eh? Nice try. Yes, the weasel and the ermine are the same animal. This mammal’s coat changes with the seasons– in its white winter fur it’s an ermine, in its brown fur it’s just a plain old weasel. Like you, Tony.

“Dr. Hal, is rectal birth possible?”

Welll… yes. That’s right, there are recorded cases of babies that have been delivered ex fundamenti– that is, through the rectum. Sometimes, during a pregnancy, blockage of the mother’s vaginal orifice may occur, forcing the full-term fetus into the rectal area; the baby must then be expelled through the anus. A 19th century British doctor named Payne (appropriate, eh?) cites the case of a thirty-three-year-old woman who gave birth in this manner. Dr. Payne palpated the perineum, and seeing the child was located near the rectum, anesthetized the mother, a Mrs. N_____, and delivered the infant with forceps through the anal aperture “with little haemorrhage,” he writes, ” and an easy removal of the placenta.” And, Presto! A bouncing (if somewhat smelly) baby boy.

“Dr. Hal, what was the name of Alexander the Great’s horse?”

This was asked recently. The answer is, Bucephalus.

“Dr. Hal, is my ass too big?” writes Fan Ameke of San Francisco.

This query, often made, is not, strictly speaking, a “Dr. Hal question.” Yet its reiteration from many of my (female) acquaintances merits a reply here. In all cases to date the answer has been an emphatic “no.” An unrealistic standard, set by freakishly thin fashion models and non-heterosexual fashion designers has caused many normally formed girls and women to feel insecure about this essential element of their natural beauty. But if we travel through time to the wellsprings of our culture, we find that in Ancient Greece temples and statues were set up to Aphrodite Kallipygos, the “Goddess with the beautiful buttocks.” Within such an aesthesis, the robust is more classically favored than the gracile. Cercidias of Megalopolis recites in his Iambic verses the tale of the “fair-buttocked sisters of Syracuse.” Two beautiful girls, daughters of a farmer, argued over which of them had the more beautiful behind. To settle this, they both displayed themselves, bending over unclothed before a fair (and wealthy) youth who passed by. The latter was so struck by the charms of the elder sister that he went to bed ill; this prompted his younger brother to view both the fair contenders, whereupon he was smitten by the charms of the younger of the pair. So obsessed became the boys that at length their father arranged to have the girls joined in marriage to the two brothers. Pleased by this turn of events, as well as by their newly acquired splendid wealth, the sisters endowed the temple of Aphrodite, calling the goddess the “Fair-Buttocked” as related also by Archelaus. And they lived happily ever after. God bless you all.

UPDATE 1: My photos from the show are now online.

UPDATE 2: Jason did a write-up of the show for Metroblogging San Francisco. Unfortunately he didn’t quite make it to the actual Ask Dr. Hal part, which is understandable considering it didn’t start until around 11:30pm and went past closing time. Hal ended the show with a recitation of Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s “The Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner” as a reward for those who stuck it out until the very end.