Infotainer Joel Bauer tells you about his business card that took him 25 years to design.
It doesn’t fit in a Roledex because it dosen’t belong in a Roledex. It’s the kind of thing that even if they don’t like you they won’t throw it out.
An interview where Joel talks about his awesome business card.
via Scott Simpson
Here Are A Few Related Posts You Might Enjoy:
- Mini Business Card File Cabinet
- Meat Cards, Business Cards Made Using Meat & Lasers
- The Squid List Gets A Re-Design As It Nears 10 Years
- Cake by Joel Veitch (Rather Good)
- Design Police, Bringing Bad Design To Justice With Stickers
{ 53 comments… read them below or add one }
If I wanted to hire an annoying douchebag, I would definintely hire this guy.
It looks like crap.. and it IS CRAP.
I find his ideas interesting and would like to subscribe to his newsletter.
is this asshole for real?
wat.
How many followers does he have on twitter?
The kind of guy who presents us with some “idea” that would save our company, and winds up talking the entire time about himself. After politely listening and thanking them for coming, we always have a good laugh after they leave.
I’ll bet he drives a hummer, because he believes he deserves it, and donates a pittance to the sierra club to ease his mind.
Hilarious! He’s got a future in pop-up books.
hilarious
Well that was certainly abrasive… But I’m convinced. When I grow up, I want my business cards to be shaped like the Enterprise, complete with photon torpedoes.
If Mr. “It’s not about being liked” handed me one of those, I’d look at it briefly, and then throw it in the trash. The guy clearly doesn’t have a clue about the real purpose of business cards. What a fool.
It is a cool card.
Proof to me that quality print will never die.
Can’t tell from the video who he is.
This YouTube video will hit more people in a day than anyone can hand out biz cards in a lifetime.
he’s right, i’d totally tote that around to show what a dbag can do with 25 years.
I’ll give him 2 bucks an hour to work for me…as a pro douche
Reminds me of this classic scene in American Psycho: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoIvd3zzu4Y
It took him 25 years to design his business card? How long did it take him to become an enormous douchbag?
Is that Chairman Mao leading the revolution on the pop-up? Either way, I’m totally getting business cards like that so I can stop focusing on providing value or being likable.
Where was this guy when I needed help making warehouse rave parties in 1991?!
That looks more like a fancy little flyer or handout than a business card.
What a fucking dick. Love it! Good one.
That was like watching a mini episode of The Office!
American Psycho meets Glen Gary Glen Ross (hehheh):
(Christian Bale – A.P.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoIvd3zzu4Y
(Alec Baldwin – G.G.G.R.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TROhlThs9qY
If this guy is clueless about “channeling” a (bad version) mash-up of these two ideas, a friend of his (if he has one) may want to give him a heads-up — this is not the way to go.
Holy cow, it’s Andy from The Office! But he’s real!
LULZ!!!!
supreme lulz. This guy is fantastic
This guy is really effective… at being a DICKSLAP.
BTW, you ever notice how the movies on DVD that were total shit always come packaged in rainbow foil stamping and embossed lettering? Why do you suppose that is — Perfect marketing?
One-quarter of his life developing an immediate “0-File”?
Call Dante, and ask him for a new level of Hell for this guy.
~Lavanna
That’s the Rev. Howland Owl, isn’t it. You didn’t fool me!
If that was an actor, he overdid the dbag bit by a couple of orders of magnitude.
If that was fa’reals, I feel sorry for the film crew and anyone else who has to interact with him.
Well, I’ll show him! I give everyone a crisp, new $10 bill with my picture glued over Mr. Hamilton’s. It doesn’t fit in a Rolodex because, it doesn’t belong in a Rolodex. It belong in your wallet with the rest of your money because I AM money!
I am now removing my douche nozzle…
I know many people like this guy. No amount of reality will puncture his balloon. Let him draw crowds. I won’t be in them, unless it’s to lynch him. Then… I will make my own card, because I get results.
I love it that when The Card comes out magically Joan Jett’s “Love is Pain” kicks in. One of the best S&M songs ever!
This guy *is* a marketing genius!
That is brilliant. He is obviously a marketing genius that we can all learn from.
wow. he scares me. I laughed outloud though. :-)
Wellington Ma’s business card was a rectangular slice of pink synthetic quartz, laser-engraved with his name, ‘The Ma-Mariano Agency,’ an address on Beverly Boulevard, and all kinds of numbers and e-mail addresses. It arrived by GlobEx in its own little gray suede envelope while Rydell was still in the hospital.
‘Looks like you could cut yourself on it,’ Rydell said.
‘You could, many no doubt have,’ said Karen Mendelsohn, ‘and if you put it in your wallet and sit down, it shatters.’
‘Then what’s the point of it?’
‘You’re supposed to take very good care of it. You won’t get another.’
i was just going to make a comment about the Joan Jett song “Love Is Pain” too. It took me a second to figure out what it was but i knew i had heard it before. i don’t know what to think about this guy but the fact that we’re all reacting this way means that his ploy works, if it’s for real. if it didn’t work, we’d all be ignoring him.
Oh, and I found him online just now, he is for real (shudder) – http://www.infotainer.com/events/ – Joel Bauer, Bauer & Associates
This guy made me laugh… Talk about the ME generation. It just points to the reason we’re in devolution: anthroposolipcism; when man stands at the center of all universes and all else is to feed his whimsy… What does it take you to be motivated…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEfEOKoFYX0
this guy is the islamic extremist of marketing
It’s funny about the “not fitting in a rolodex” thing. I had a friend in college 20 years ago in my graphic design program who made his business card an odd shape for that exact reason. Trendsetter!
I agree with everything he says. In order to stand out, I made my business card different from everyone else’s. What I did was to leave the front blank. And printed all the information on the back! Sheer super-genius, if you ask me.
Haha this guy is quite the character. Nice find!
The fact that it does not fit in a rolodex: is it not defying the purpose of a business card? (I think someone said something similar above.) Innovation for innovation is pointless unless it is to go around a patent lolll.
There are baby pictures in the background somehow it doesn’t fit in the picture (either).
Why would anyone brag that it took him 25 years to develop THIS? In 25 years Silicon Valley produced Cisco, Ebay, Google, Yahoo, the rebirth of Apple, Adobe (OK, 27 years), Intuit, Nvidia, Business Objects …… and he did his business card. Yikes!
Bullshit Guaranteed!
Vid 1: “This card IS expensive. It’s about $4 a card.”
Vid 2: “It’s not expensive by the way, as a matter of fact it’s hand cut. Anyone can do it in their home.”
Contradickhead.
Office… Submarine!
Four bucks! Fer a fraggin’ biz card? What a maroon. Just buy your client a beer, then hope this guy’s in the bar, if he is, go over, kick his ass, and I GUARANTEE you have a new sale. Buy my new book ‘Stomp Your Way To Riches’. HAR!
Video #1? Yeah, it was directed & produced by this guy -> http://galahadproductions.blogspot.com/ < And even HE gives testimony to Joel’s success.
- Do your research: Google ‘Joel Bauer’
- Do you have a best selling book?
- Are you retired at age 45?
- Have you ever watched a freakin’ actor do his job properly??
- Fact: the man has made more money than everyone commenting on this board put together. Love him, hate him, fact is he doesn’t give a sh*t about your business card.
How many of you have a viral video about your business card? Sour grapes.
Apparently you spent a lot of time editing that film. Do you think you might be brainwashed?
Wow you people are jaded — of course he’s obnoxious, that’s his pitch. He would probably even agree that he’s brash, in your face, and even obnoxious.
If you’re talking garbage about him, then you don’t fucking get it.
You don’t get the fact that he’s absolutely right. This is a great idea — will I buy it from this guy? No. But he’s done a great job and I’ll take a lot of his hard work and emulate it in my marketing strategy.
:-)
What you fail to grasp about Joel Bauer is that the video you are referring to shows Joel in character… This is not Joel Bauer the person….just shows how little you understand. I should know I have trained with him (and was joined by some of the best public speakers/platform closers). He is the most amazing and articulate speaker I know.
This guy is the biggest liar on the planet. He has been fired by more companies on tradeshow floors for his over the top crude humor and abbrasiveness. He ran out of clients for tradeshows and started this stupid motivation stuff and he has these idiots that believe him and all the so call money hes made. This is a man who lied to tv producers to get on a show called magicians homes. He borrowed a guys house which was a castle in calif and lied on television and said it was his and he placed each brick in place on the driveway. This guy is a huge liar says he has been on the tonight show 25 times look it up on the tonight show web site for guests and he hasent even been on once. Everything this guy says is a lie and i wouldnt give him a penny and for the idiot that says he is retired, then why is he out beating the bushes why because thats another lie. LIE LIE LIE THATS JOEL BAUER A LIAR AND A DAMN GOOD ONE AT THAT.